Is Your Family Sabotaging Your Dreams?
Feb 04, 2014
Moving abroad is exciting… new experiences, new cities, new friends and the feeling that you’re truly doing something that you, and you alone, want to do.
But mixed in with these wonderful feelings of anticipation and excitement might be guilt… even a sense of foreboding doom, that you’re making a terrible decision. Although there are a myriad of emotions involved with moving to a new country, having an unsupportive base of friends and/or family surrounding you to the lead-up of your departure can be more detrimental then you may have ever dreamed. After all, you’re taking off to pursue your dreams, and all they’re left with are memories of their time spent with you.
Is this your fault? Absolutely not! And realizing that it’s not, may be the most important thing to keep you in a positive mind-set…
Of course, there are other ways to help your friends and family make this transition along with you:
As soon as you’ve made the choice to move and you know where you’re going, communicate to your friends and family. If you’re not worried about them trying to talk you out of it, certainly share with them well before making a final choice, but if you know they’ll react shockingly, you’re better off waiting until the decision is a done deal. Share with them why you’re moving, what you hope to accomplish by making this move and remain calm throughout the process… this will help to show them you’re serious in your decision.
Carve Out Time!
You’re going to be very busy leading up to you departure; shopping, packing, paperwork, doctor appointments and a whole whack of last-minute details to deal with. Don’t forget to carve out quality time to spend with those close to you, especially your family.
This is a tricky one… you want to make sure you remain cheerful, but not ‘in-your-face’ happy that you’re leaving. Try to avoid emotional discussions and reminders that you soon won’t be around; although initially inevitable, breaking down every time you spend time with your loved ones won’t help anyone…
The first several weeks after you leave will be tough on everyone; you’ll be homesick and anxious, your friends and family will miss you and be worried about you. Because you were the one who decided to leave, you need to stay strong… touch base, let everyone know you’re safe in your new home country.
Once you arrive in your new country, stay busy. Get involved in your community, explore, talk to people, join clubs, go out… live!
After the initial shock of you leaving and being gone, your friends and family will enjoy getting updates from you. Send e-mails, set Skype dates, start a blog, share pictures, heck; send postcards (people LOVE getting postcards!) Staying in touch with your loved ones is so easy in today’s technologically advanced world, and everyone (including you!) will benefit from sharing stories about what’s happening in each other’s lives.
In many cases, the way your loved ones will react to news that you’re moving abroad has a lot to do with you. These are the people who know you best, and if this is the life path you’re choosing, chances are they felt it coming. No doubt about it, it’s tough to leave those you care about, but remind them that you’re only a phone call or e-mail away. Plus, now they have an excuse to visit a new country themselves… with their very own personal tour guide.
An excellent way to check out a new country is on a Discovery Weekend!